Thursday, February 9, 2017

Trump bans imported chocolate - Hershey's stock soars!

Note: The top part of this post is an example of satirical fake news.

In a surprising and unprecedented move, President Trump has banned the importation of chocolate from seven chocolate producing nations. 

"The chocolate from these seven countries shouldn't even be called chocolate. It's disgraceful stuff," Trump said. "We don't need to import the bad chocolate that's coming out of those countries. Hershey's makes terrific chocolate and they make it right here in the U.S.A. and they get their cocoa from Hawaii. They also have a terrific theme park and I encourage Americans from all over the country to visit it. There's no place like it anywhere. The streets are paved in chocolate, and you're not going to find that anywhere else in the world. I love the place and I love Hershey's chocolate. It's really terrific chocolate."

With Valentine's Day coming up and Easter right around the corner, the timing of this ban on imported chocolate could not be better for American chocolate producers. The value of Hershey's stock has doubled and trading in chocolate futures has been very active. 

When asked if he owned any stock in Hershey's, President Trump told reporters, "None that I know of. Besides, all of my investments are now being managed by other members of my family to make sure that there's never a conflict of interest. It would be pretty disgraceful for me to be talking about how great Hershey's chocolate is if I knowingly owned stock in the company."

The Origin of Valentine's Day

Did you know that Valentine’s day was rooted in a festival called Lupercalia in pagan Rome? It involved abusing women and engaging in some sort of sexual lottery. I guess that sounds romantic to some people. 

And how did the image of a naked baby flying around and shooting arrows at people become a symbol of love? That's more like a scene out of a horror movie.

Years ago, I told my wife that I preferred not to celebrate Valentine’s Day. The next year, after I moved back into the house, I brought her some flowers. Go along to get along, right?

Valentine’s Day Trivia


When sugar and candy were rationed during World War II, flowers became the preeminent gift for Valentine’s Day. 

Americans spend about $13 billion annually to celebrate Valentine's Day.

About 145 million valentine cards are purchased annually. Women purchase 80%of all greeting cards.

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